is dating in the bible? (lesson)

Is dating in the Bible? To answer upfront NO.

Dating, by definition, is a fairly new concept to our culture.

Now, as time goes on, new cultural and social practices will continue to be introduced and created.

Things will always be changing in this world we live in and social norms will continue to evolve.

It is because of this, however, that we should cling to what the Word instructs us regarding all areas of our lives so that we don’t stray too far from God’s original intent for His us.

Example:
God created music. He created it for our enjoyment and for His for that matter. The ways we listen to and enjoy music, however, has changed since the beginning of mankind. We are living in a world where we can access music from just about anywhere; the internet, our phones, music videos, downloads, etc. Even though the ease or access, distribution, and creation have changed, God’s original intent has not. The impact music has on and in us has not. Even though God desires for us to enjoy it, He also desires to be glorified in and with music. Also, no matter how music evolves, words will always, ALWAYS have great power.

Proverbs 18: 21 (Message Translation)
Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose.

So, no matter how technology advances, the words and lyrics we allow ourselves to listen to will always have the power of death and life in them.

The wisdom from the Word regarding music will always remain constant:
• Guard our hearts with all diligence, for out of our hearts come the issues of life. (Proverbs 4:23)
• Evil communication corrupts good manners. (1 Corinthians 15:33)
• Do not be deceived, God is not mocked. Whatever you sow you will reap. (Galatians 6:7)

The point is, no matter how society evolves the truths of the Word do not and will always apply to our lives in some shape or form.

The same is true regarding this whole dating thing.
We have to take the more modern day practice of dating and line it up the best we can with the models set in the Bible in order to get back to God’s original intent.

Matthew 1:18 (New Living Translation)
This is how Jesus the Messiah was born. His mother, Mary, was engaged to be married to Joseph. But before the marriage took place, while she was still a virgin, she became pregnant through the power of the Holy Spirit.

In the King James version, the word that was used instead of engaged was “espoused.”
This word means the following:

1 to woo her and ask her in marriage
2 to be promised in marriage, be betrothed

The word “espoused” implies that there was some type of relationship between Joseph and Mary before they were married.

Joseph, in some way or fashion, “wooed” Mary in order to win her affections.

This is HEALTHY and GODLY. There is nothing wrong with attempting to win over the affections of someone you like. BUT, God designed for this “wooing” to be going on towards the person we are considering for marriage.

We are not talking about casual attractions here.

We are talking about a person we are seriously considering to marry and be a potential parent for our children.

Now that we have a Biblical model, we should desire for our own personal life applications to follow suit.

Every ones own personal life experiences will merit different forms of applicability, but here are some considerations:

1. If you are in a relationship now, is it with someone that you can see yourself marrying?
2. If you are in a relationship now, do you find yourself interested in other people?
3. Do you go out on dates with different people only because you think it is fun to do?
4. Are you even ready to be considering marriage? Financially, in maturity, responsibly, spiritually?
5. Is marriage the farthest thing from your mind right now, but you still like going out alone with people you are attracted to, engage in kissing and other forms of affection with those people without desiring any type of serious commitment?

OK, so take your answers to those questions and then look back to the model of Joseph and Mary. If you are not “wooing” as a result of a desire and readiness for marriage, then you probably need to just hold off on serious relationships right now.

Just that easy, you are lining yourself up with the Word of God and setting yourself up to receive God’s best in this area of your life.

This is the walk of faith.

To sum this all up:
1. Dating is a fairly new concept to our culture.
2. There are no Biblical examples of “dating.”
3. Our desires regarding relationships, regardless of how our society and culture define them, should always strive to be in line with God’s original intent and plan.

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