Anyway, as the e-mails began to fly around preparing for this next attempt to recruit for youth ministry, I began to wonder about youth ministry positions - are our current positions tailor made for our ministry and what we needed?  It reminded me of a question a Youth Ministry Director sent me a few weeks ago after reading an article on our site called “Relational Youth Ministry – Leader Communication with Parents.”    See the question below:

I would like to hear some more suggestions related to this article. We have horrible troubles with communicating to parents even though we do all of the things suggested above. We’ve tried mailing letters, and they say they never get them. We try e-mailing multiple times about everything we do, but parents still act oblivious to what’s happening in the youth group. I really don’t have time to call each parent in the youth group individually for every event. We’re just not sure what to do about this problem.

Well, the problem she describes is definitely not uncommon when working in youth ministry.  A couple of things come to mind when I consider her issue:

1. She may need another hand or two to help out in her youth ministry…or at minimum have her current leaders, if she has the luxury of having leaders on her team, take on additional responsibility to assist her.

2. Maybe creating a position called “Parent Connections Coordinator” could help in directing a new or current volunteer on this specific need and how to go about meeting it.  Just think about it – having one person dedicated to building relationships between the parent and the youth ministry…especially in a smaller church (1 – 500 members is what I’m thinking) – this could potentially go a long way and be very effective.

The volunteer positions that you create don’t have to be ones that are common to other youth ministries.  Drama Coordinator, Small Groups Leader, Jr. High Coordinator, Game Room Supervisor, Alter Worker, etc…all of these are definitely positions that volunteers can fill.  But when you have a specific need, and no extra hands to help meet it, then recruiting may be in order…and having a description to explain your specific need can help you find just the right volunteer match as well as let them know exactly what they are committing to.

Here is a sample position description template for you to use for reference when creating yours.  This is a position we created specifically for what we need here at XYM.  If you have any other questions regarding developing position descriptions and recruting, feel free to comment below!

Position Description – Entertainment/Youth Culture Researcher

 Initiating acts of love (which means the love expression starts with something you do) towards others can be very fun and easy to do, especially on Valentine’s Day.  Over time, we begin to associate initiated actions of goodness and kindness with the love we have for others and most times begin to think that initiated actions of love are the only forms of true love.  However, the Bible talks about other forms of love that are just as, if not more, important.  I call them “Responding Acts of Love”.

 What are Responding Acts of Love?

 Responding acts of love are the things you do to express goodness and kindness toward others when they initiate any action (whether good or bad) towards you.  In other words, it is how you react to something that is done to you.  For example, when your classmate gave you the “You’re Groovy” card, you say “Thank You” or give them a card in return.  That’s a responding act of love; someone did something nice for you and you in turn did something nice for them.  That is usually also fun and easy to do. However, the type of responding acts of love I want to discuss today is expressing love towards someone after they have initiated bad actions towards you. To me, this is when true love is expressed in its purest form. 

 As you go through the Bible, it seems like God spends a lot of time instructing us on how to respond when someone does us wrong.  It seems like the appropriate and justified action would be to act mean to them too, but that is so far from what God sees as love.  Let’s look at some instructions from the Bible on how we should respond when we think others have done us wrong.

 Biblical View of Responding Acts of Love

 1.       Being quick to forgive.

Matthew 6:14-15 – “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

 2.       Not taking into account the wrong done to you.

1 Corinthians 13:5 AMP –“…it (love) takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].”

 3.       Not returning an evil for evil.

Matthew 5:38-39 Message – “Here’s another old saying that deserves a second look: ‘Eye for eye, tooth for tooth.’ Is that going to get us anywhere? Here’s what I propose: ‘Don’t hit back at all.’ If someone strikes you, stand there and take it.”

 4.       Speaking kind words in response to harsh words.

Proverbs 15:1 – “A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire.”

 5.       Pray for those who initiate bad actions toward you.

Matthew 5:44-45 Message – I’m telling you to love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst. When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer, for then you are working out of your true selves, your God-created selves. This is what God does. He gives his best—the sun to warm and the rain to nourish—to everyone, regardless: the good and bad, the nice and nasty.

Doing the above mentioned things is what true love really is. Expressing love to someone that is not expressing love towards you is the love of our God.  Jesus died for us no matter if we choose to serve Him or not.  So, how can you begin to improve your expression of love towards those that are in your life?

“Love is patient and kind (I Cor 13:4).” Many generously wanted to send food, clothes and blankets. However, the best tool Haiti could ever acquire for the massive earthquake cleanup would be the funds to keep the rescue efforts coming. And many responded accordingly. U.S. Magazine reported that celebrities helped raise $9 million in one night on Larry King Live. And this does not include donations the average household contributed to the American Red Cross and other charities. Even the young generation broke media relief records by texting contributions through cell phones and chalking up a $10 charge on next month’s bill. 

 “Love never gives up, never loses faith… (I Cor 13:7).”Aid organization Doctors Without Borders had five supply planes diverted from their rescue mission. But it didn’t stop the organization from using quick thinking to do their absolute all in saving lives. Renzo Fricke, the group’s chief in Haiti, told CNN that in order to make life-saving operations: “This morning we had to buy a saw in the market, in the city … for our surgeons to do amputations,” he said, “the medical equipment is not coming as it should arrive.”

Everyone can do something to make a difference in some way.  No matter your age or your financial position or where you live, we call can do something to help in the relief efforts in Haiti.

1. Give, give, give.  The relief effort in Haiti is not going away any time soon.  There are months of work ahead for the Haitian people to rebuild and financial support will need to keep coming.  Find a local charity (or maybe your local church has something going there) to give financially to as often as you or as God leads.  Examples supports Compassion International, a Christian child advocacy ministry that releases children from spiritual, economic, social and physical poverty and enables them to become responsible, fulfilled Christian adults.  http://www.compassion.com  You can make a donation directly to their Haiti relief effort by clicking the below:

https://www.compassion.com/contribution/default.htm

2. Pray, pray, pray.  We should all pray frequently regarding the recovery of Haiti.  Prayer for the families that lost loved ones, for children who lost parents and siblings, for families that lost homes, for individuals that lost everything, for the government to rebuild and strengthen.  There is so much to pray for and God will hear you and answer.

3. Mission Trips.  If the opportunity presents itself, consider taking a missions trip to Haiti to help in the relief efforts and serve the Haitian people with God’s love.  Northwest Haiti Christian Mission is just one organization that is offering opportunities to travel to Haiti to minister to their people.  http://www.nwhcm.org  Your local church may also be planning trips for you and your family to get involved in. 

We all are able to do at least one of the above items in order to help this country.  If you know of other ways for people to get involved with Haiti relief, please let us know by posting a comment or contacting us at contact@examplesyouth.org.  We will review and post for others to read about.

 “Fathers, don’t exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master.” (Ephesians 6:4 The Message Translation)

There is much revelation that can be mined from the two scriptures above, but in this I want to focus more on the relationships between fathers and daughters and the impact fathers have in their lives.

Men, your daughters are watching you.  Everything you do, everything you say, how you treat them, how you treat your wife and other women.  You are the primary example of what the relationship between a man and a woman should be.  Whatever it is you are or are not doing will affect how they view themselves and affect their future relationships.

With this in mind, why don’t we do what the scripture says, to “take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master.”  When I see that phrase, personal involvement comes to mind.  I believe what God is telling us is that we need to do more than give our daughters instructions, make rules about curfew and the kind of guys to watch out for.  Not saying there is anything wrong with these things, but there needs to be impartation into their lives.  We need to embrace our responsibility as the leader in our homes and influence and model, not dictate, what is the Godly way. 

Part of our role as a father is to “lead” them in the right way.  Let’s give them an example to follow.  Let’s “take them by the hand” and show them how they are supposed to be treated when out on a date by literally taking them on dates.  This can start early, but it is never too late to start.  My daughter is only two at the time of this article.  Our latest date was a trip to the movies to see “The Princess an the Frog.”  During this time, she is the center of my attention.  I shower her with all the love and affirmation I can come up with.  Even though at two, she rarely makes it through the entire movie without her eyes getting heavy, the point is not that she isn’t old enough to sit through a movie.  The point is that there is one-on-one time with her dad, who is modeling and demonstrating how the gentle, godly love of a man should look and feel.

It is also our role to show our daughters how their future husbands should meet their emotional needs.  Much of this will be modeled by the way we meet the emotional needs of our wives.  They will learn how a man should talk to them, serve them, cover and protect them by our execution of these things towards their mothers – whether the mother is in the home or not. 

Bottom line, when this Valentine’s Day roles around, let’s all decide to do our best to include our daughters in the “romancing” and expressions of love.  Let’s tell them how much we love them so that they don’t have to search for it from others that want to take advantage of them.  Let’s build their self-esteem by telling them they are beautiful, smart, capable, and supporting them in their endeavors even when we may not have a natural interest in those things.  Let’s take the time to listen to them and encourage communication with them.

The Bible says that as arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth (Psalm 127:4).  A mighty man knows his target and he skillfully points his arrows in the direction of that target and hits it. When we set the target for our daughters to be virtuous women of God, we skillfully point them in that direction by the personal, quality time that we spend with them, the gentle and firm instructions and corrections we give, and the Godly example we set before them.  My prayer is that when its time to send my daughter off, she will hit the target God intended for her life. 

You better believe I’m giving it all I have to ensure her safe delivery.

By Eddie Mason, III, Director

These are some of the most memorable lines in “Alice and Wonderland”.  Do you remember…?  The White Rabbit of course!  This begins Alice’s journey as she follows the White Rabbit down the rabbit hole into Wonderland. 

This was one of my favorite movies growing up as a child.  I remember watching it constantly with my two cousins.  Alice adventure ran her into some interesting characters such as the Cheshire Cat, the March Hare, the Red Queen and who could forget the Mad Hatter.

Well guess what….Alice has returned to Wonderland!  That’s right…Disney has made a 3-D sequel scheduled for release March 5th.  In the sequel Alice is now 19 and attends a party at a Victorian estate shortly after the death of her father. The party is a surprise engagement party for Alice planned by her mother and sister. Just as the arrogant and dull Hamish Ascot proposes to Alice under a gazebo and under the eyes of hundreds of snooty society-types, Alice spots a white rabbit wearing a waistcoat and pocket watch. In shock and confusion, she runs off into a maze and follows the White Rabbit through it, only to later tumble down a rabbit hole into Wonderland, a place she has visited ten years before, yet doesn’t remember. In Wonderland, she reunites with her childhood friends, including the Mad Hatter, who explains to Alice that they need her help in over-throwing the Red Queen, who has assumed control of all Wonderland. Alice then embarks — assuming both large and small sizes — on an adventure of self discovery and to save Wonderland and her Wonderland friends from both the Jabberwocky and the Red Queen’s reign of terror.

 The movie is not currently rated but should prove to be a good family flick.  Go check it out and let us know what you think!

Watch the movie trailer here.

By Valerie Kennedy (adapted from Wikipedia)
XYM Entertainment Researcher

1. No Communion with Unbelievers

Let’s start by looking at 2 Corinthians 6:14.

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in
common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

The word yoked means to be “joined” together or to be “attached.”

When people fellowship or when you have a “communion”, there is some type of common association in which an “exchange” of some sort is happening.

Here are a few types of words used to describe fellowship and communion:

Share, community, association, joint participation…here are some deep ones…intimacy, intercourse (Oooo…)

Based on these words, this scripture is basically asking us:
“How can two people that are unequal have a true, intimate relationship?”

We are not saying that one person is better than the other. That’s not what this means.

It’s asking, “How can two people who believe differently, have different values and morals have an effective relationship”?

If you have made a decision to live a life according to God’s Word, it’s important that you do your best to put people in your life that have decided the same. If not, you may have a harder time, maybe even impossible time, trying to live a life pleasing to God and one filled with His blessings. You also will open your life up to a boat load of conflicts, arguments, disagreements, and DRAMA. From how to spend your money, how to raise your kids, how to resolve issues…when one person wants to do the Word and the other can care less about doing the Word…you get my drift. The Bible tells us that two people living like this CANNOT do any of the above effectively:

Amos 3:3 (New Living Translation)
Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?

1 Corinthians 6:15 (New Living Translation)
What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?

After reading this, it should be pretty clear what the Word of God instructs in regards to being in a romantic relationship with someone that does not confess Jesus as Lord AND does not desire to live according to the Word.

The answer is: We should not do it!

2. I Know People That Are Married but Only One Spouse is Saved…What About Them?

There are many, many circumstances where a couple is married and one person is saved and the other person isn’t.

This could happen for a number of reasons:
1. Neither were saved when they got married, but one became saved after the fact.
2. The saved partner didn’t know any better (regarding what the Word says) at the time they got married.
3. The saved partner really didn’t care that the other person was not saved and married them anyway.

Whatever the reasons are, God in His infinite wisdom has made allowances in His Word for this and has given the saved partner instructions on how to apply the Word:

1 Corinthians 7:12 – 15
12 Now, I will speak to the rest of you, though I do not have a direct command from the Lord. If a Christian man has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to continue living with him, he must not leave her. 13 And if a Christian woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him. 14 For the Christian wife brings holiness to her marriage, and the Christian husband brings holiness to his marriage. Otherwise, your children would not be holy, but now they are holy. 15 (But if the husband or wife who isn’t a believer insists on leaving, let them go. In such cases the Christian husband or wife is no longer bound to the other, for God has called you to live in peace.)

God also gives instructions on how a saved spouse can lead an unsaved spouse to Christ:

1 Peter 3:1 – 2
1 In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over 2 by observing your pure and reverent lives.

Even though this scripture is talking to wives, the principle of living a godly life in front of your spouse applies to husbands as well in order for them to lead their unsaved wives to God.

In one area of the Word, God is clearly instructing us to not join ourselves in close relationships (like courting and marriage) with unbelievers, but also shows us how to live if we end up in a marriage with someone that does not believe the Word. God is so good to us.

3. What This is NOT Saying

OK, just to make some things clear, let’s outline a couple of things that this these scriptures are NOT saying:

a. They are not saying that you have a choice to enter into “either” a relationship with a Christian or one with a non-Christian.

Yes, ultimately it is our own choice and free will to do what we want to do, but the Word is instructing us on the best way to enter into a relationship, while also extending grace to those that did not enter into a relationship the best way.

b. They are not saying that a relationship will not work out if you don’t follow instruction #1.

On the contrary, God wants His goodness in our lives and has done all that He can to ensure we experience His goodness, even in our missteps.

Some may have parents that are not both saved. Life can still be good – for both them and for you.

Either application of the Word explained above will produce God’s goodness for all involved. One path may be a bit more challenging than the other, but good nevertheless.

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“When I realized that my selfish decision for love could result into some young girl getting killed, I could not be easy with that part. I couldn’t be responsible,” Rhianna told Diane Sawyer. “If Chris never hit me again, who’s to say their boyfriend won’t?”

Rihanna’s final decision was not only unselfish, but it was a perfect example of how living a responsible life can inspire others to do the same. And for those who believe in Christ, this principle is significant. Sometimes we all can inadvertently become role models, whether it is towards a younger brother or sister who closely watches what we wear and do, or a friend who is curious about our relationship with God but still doesn’t quite understand the gospel.

You can find Rihanna’s daring hairstyles in high schools across the country and hear her voice on car stereos everywhere. So it shouldn’t be a surprise that young and older ladies imitated her decision to get out of an abusive and potentially deadly relationship.  And one can wonder how many look to us? We Christians are supposed to be the salt of the earth. And according to the book of Matthew, if we lose our flavor, who will the world look to as an example?

“..You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden…Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:13-16 NKJV)

We have a responsibility to be a Godly example that inspires others to want and obtain the best life possible.

How many times have we judged others in front of our children, cheated a waitress out of a tip on a lunch date with friends, or grew angry in front of strangers because a line was too long? We must continue to compare our lives to the Word and adjust in the areas that do not reflect love.

“Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors…they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world.” (1 Peter 2:12 NLT)

Rihanna found the strength to rid her own selfishness so that others may benefit. She even possibly saved a life. And if we continue to deny our selfishness, we can possibly lead those closest to us to salvation. With one decision, Rhianna gave hope and encouragement to people everywhere. In our daily walk with Lord, do we?

Luke 2: 1 – 7 (AMP)

¹In those days it occurred that a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that the whole Roman empire should be registered.

²This was the first enrollment, and it was made when Quirinius was governor of Syria.

³And all the people were going to be registered, each to his own city or town.

⁴And Joseph also went up from Galilee from the town of Nazareth to Judea, to the town of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and family of David,

⁵To be enrolled with Mary, his espoused (married) wife, who was about to become a mother.

⁶And while they were there, the time came for her delivery,

⁷And she gave birth to her Son, her Firstborn; and she wrapped Him in swaddling clothes and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room or place for them in the inn.

A few days ago, I heard a story depicting Mary and Joseph’s, as in parents of Jesus, journey to Bethlehem for the census when she was pregnant with Jesus.  It was the first time I ever really considered what Mary went through on that trip or what Joseph may have been feeling.  Think about it – Mary was nine months pregnant and went on what was probably about an 11-day trip on a donkey!  I can’t even imagine going on a road trip in a car for 11 days if I was nine months pregnant!  Just thinking about the discomforts I had when I was in my last trimester…my goodness.  This was not an easy trip for her.

Can you imagine what Joseph was going through?  The woman he loved and was responsible for was exhausted and uncomfortable.  He didn’t have a bed for her to sleep in during the nights.  He didn’t have the comforts from home that could ease her during their travels.  When she went into labor, did he lose it?  Was he frantic and feeling helpless???  I imagine all he could do is his best to find a safe place for her to deliver and do his best to help and provide for her.  That had to have been hard for him.

Now, try to imagine the whole cave scene where Jesus was born.  I already have trouble thinking about natural child birth with no meds!  Mary was surrounded by animals and their excretions, outdoors, and probably laid on the ground while giving birth (maybe she had some hay to lay on I don’t know!).  Bottom line, this was a less than ideal place for her to be, but she got through it and all went well.

When I heard the story, I was like, whoa…I don’t know if I could have done that.  I don’t know if I could have gone through all of those discomforts and hard times.  I’m sure Mary had her doubts at times too, but…God chose her to carry and bare His Son.  He knew Mary would take care of herself while pregnant.  He knew that she would make sound decisions about her body during the delivery.  He also knew that Joseph would have the wisdom, ability, and provisions to take care of her and Jesus.  He trusted them with His only Son.  What a big deal.

After pondering this entire ordeal, I believe the Holy Spirit whispered these words to me, “Hey, I trust you too.”  What???  Wow.  God has put His trust in Eddie and I to care for the two children He has blessed us with.  When things get hard and uncomfortable, He is saying, “I trust you.  I trust you with two of my prized possessions.  Care for them.  Keep and protect them.  Teach and discipline them.  Love them well.”  God has given us all of the wisdom, ability and anointing necessary to raise our children from infants to adulthood.  Just as Mary and Joseph got through that very rough journey, we can get through our very rough journeys in life with our children as we trust and rely on God to lead us.

What peace I have knowing that I don’t have to fear that I am incapable of being a parent.  It’s one of the only jobs you get where there is no orientation prior to getting started.  All of it is on the job training.  So because of this, God has implanted in our Spirits the ability to successfully rear our children as He watchfully and faithfully orders our steps.

So I admonish you today.  If your journey happens to be rough during this season of life, take courage.  God has not left you stranded, just like He did not leave Mary and Joseph stranded with Jesus.  He has equipped you for this occupation and you can do it; and not just get by with the minimum effort, but you can do it well.  The God of Mary and Joseph, the Father of our Lord Jesus, is with you.

Now, I am very aware that there are many images of beauty in the world; all of different races and ethnicities so don’t get me wrong.  But, what we cannot deny is the HUGE media buzz around the movie The Princess and the Frog and what it means to little African-American girls all over the world.  It is exciting to see and maybe it will be another piece of the puzzle in recreating and adjusting the images of what we all view as beautiful – impacting races of people everywhere.

A press release describes the story as follows (from Art Daily and Disney.com):

When the free-spirited, jazz-loving Prince Naveen of Maldonia (Bruno Campos) comes to town, a deal with a shady voodoo doctor (Keith David) goes bad and the once suave royal is turned into a frog. In a desperate attempt to be human again, a favor in exchange for a fateful kiss on the lips from the beautiful girl, Tiana (Anika Noni Rose), takes an unexpected turn and leads them both on a hilarious adventure through the mystical bayous of Louisiana to the banks of the almighty Mississippi and back in time for Mardi Gras in New Orleans. An unforgettable tale filled with music, humor and heart where two frogs—along with the help of a 197-year-old voodoo priestess, a love-sick Cajun firefly, and a trumpet-playing alligator—discover that what they want isn’t as important as what they need.

In the official trailer it is revealed that once Tiana kisses the frog prince, she herself becomes a frog, and they must journey together to change themselves back to humans.

View movie trailer here: http://disney.go.com/disneypictures/princessandthefrog/

Materials:

Two buckets full of popcorn

Two empty buckets

A dessert-sized paper plate for each player

Instructions:

1.) Divide the youth group into two teams (maybe more teams depending on how many teens are present).

2.) The first player scoops their plate into the full bucket of popcorn.

3.) Then they hop on one foot to the finish line and pour whatever is left on their plate into their empty bucket.

4.) Then they run back and tag the next person in line, who does the same process. The process continues until the last players on each team reach the finish line.

5.) The team who has the most popcorn in their bucket at the finish line wins!

Play upbeat, energetic music while game is played. The music starts on “Go” and stops when a team wins.