Ask the Youth Director – “Creating Zeal in our Students”

Youth Leader Question: What are some things you did besides prayer that gave the youth you worked with that zeal / passion for christ?

XYM Answer: Well, honestly as long as I have worked with youth, only a handful have shown zeal while they were young.  The majority of the time, the fruit of the Word did not show up until they were adults.  I don’t believe this to have to be the case, (I am sure there are youth groups around full of students excited about serving God) but I unfortunately have not experienced a youth group where the majority of the youth are living totally sold out for God and displaying that zeal outwardly.

 I have also found that just because they are not showing a zeal does not mean the Word is not impacting and changing them.  Many youth just don’t “show it.”  Part of this is the nature of a teen.  Sometimes they may just kinda sit there and act like they are bored or not listening.  This many times is not the case.  Many times as adult leaders we want them to respond to the Word and worship as we do.  Most of them don’t in my experience, but that does not take away from our responsibility in teaching them, modeling before them, and encouraging them.  It also does not take away from them experiencing God at their level.

 On a different note, what do they respond to?  Attention and consistent care.  Almost every time.  You want to reach them, you get involved personally.  Don’t be so concerned about their outward “spritual” display per say, but we as leaders showing them Jesus by being Jesus in their lives…man, talk about impact…

 Now, I will say, when you have a smaller group, probably about 25 kids or so, the opportunity to invest the Word into them is much greater.  I would suggest doing small group activities (groups of about 5 or 6 youth) on a regular basis that allow open discussion between the youth and the leaders of the group.  Keeping the youth leader and the youth in the group consistent is a plus – meaning the same youth meet in the same group with the same leaders each time if possible.  The development of the relationships between the leader and the youth, and ultimately the leader and the parents/guardians, goes a very long way.  I have some of my “adult” youth now that contact me on a regular basis based on the relationship that  we developed when they were teens.  Small groups are powerful, powerful ways to invest your heart and the Word.  They get to know you as a leader and through you, get to know God.

 These are just my suggestions from my limited life experience and research.  Every church has their own set of circumstances that make things work or not work as well as their own vision for their youth ministry, so feel free to try things and see what is working for your group – the kids will definitely let you know!  LOL.

Examples Family – Strengthening Families and the Ministries that Serve Them!

Visit us at www.ExamplesFamily.org.

Examples Family Ministries is the arm of Examples Ministries, Inc. that exists to serve one purpose, to strengthen the entire family – Mothers, Fathers, Husbands, Wives, Children and Youth. By offering a variety of equipping resources and biblical insight, we strive to provide individuals and families, from all walks of life, with tools that will assist them in growing personally and investing their faith in God in others.

Vision and Mission of Examples Family Ministries

Titus 2:1 – 8 (MSG)

Your job is to speak out on the things that make for solid doctrine. Guide older men into lives of temperance, dignity, and wisdom, into healthy faith, love, and endurance. Guide older women into lives of reverence so they end up as neither gossips nor drunks, but models of goodness. By looking at them, the younger women will know how to love their husbands and children, be virtuous and pure, keep a good house, be good wives. We don’t want anyone looking down on God’s Message because of their behavior. Also, guide the young men to live disciplined lives. But mostly, show them all this by doing it yourself, incorruptible in your teaching, your words solid and sane. Then anyone who is dead set against us, when he finds nothing weird or misguided, might eventually come around.

Our mission is to provide Families, Parents, Children’s Ministry Leaders, Youth Ministry Leaders, Ministries and Organizations with resources, information, teaching, and training that empower them to:

1. Grow in faith.
2. Strengthen families.
3. Impart their faith in God and His Word to their children and others.
4. Develop and strengthen programming within their ministries, organizations and communities in order to do all of the above.

Examples Family currently has the following areas of ministry focus:

• Children’s Ministry Resources – provides information and resources to support churches in their Children’s Ministry efforts and in their connection to the families that they serve.
   
• XYM (Examples Youth Ministries) – provides information and resources to support churches and youth organizations in their efforts to reach youth grades 6th – 12th and their parents.
   
• Mother’s Ministry – provides information, resources, assistance, and encouragement to mothers from all walks of life. Provides resources for churches and organizations to develop and maintain mom’s groups that desire to provide encouragement, equipping, information, natural and spiritual support for mothers; ultimately equipping mothers to impart their faith to their children and serve their families in motherhood. We also provide information and workshops designed to further equip leaders of mothers groups as well workshops for mothers and families.
   
• Parenting Ministry – provides information and resources for equipping parents in their role of “parenting” and imparting their faith to their children.
   
• Marriage Ministry – provides natural and Biblical information and resources to help strengthen marriages.
   
• Outreach – Works to provide resources, training, time, skills, or whatever is needed to assist individuals or families in need; either nationally or internationally. This can take on many forms; either partnering with existing organizations or creating our own outreach opportunity.

celebrity head game

Materials:

Three headbands or headpieces that you can stick paper into

10-15 index cards

Marker

 Instructions:

1.)    Get three headbands or headpieces onto which you can slot or stick a piece of paper or card into it. 

2.)    Make sure you have 10-15 cards, and write the name of a celebrity in big letters on each card. 

3.)    Then choose three volunteers to sit in front of the group. Place a headpiece with a card on each volunteer. 

4.)    Be careful not to let them see the name of the person on their headpiece. It’s their job to guess which name is on their head, but the catch is the answer can only ask “yes” or
“no” questions. (For example, “Am I a male?”  “Am I on TV?”)

5.)    Each person can ask as many questions as they want until they get a “No” answer, then it goes to the next person and so-on until eventually someone guesses and they are declared the winner!

6.)    This works well if you throw in a ‘local’ celebrity (such as the Youth Pastor, etc)

great tragedy leads to great love

Close to 200,000 people are dead, more than a million are homeless and the injured include hundreds of thousands. Whether anyone has a connection to Haiti or not, the aftermath is seen through the same lens – a horrific one that reflects the likes of an apocalyptic film. But it is usually in the midst of great tragedy, where many of us show our extension of God’s love towards strangers. This disaster is no different.

“Love is patient and kind (I Cor 13:4).” Many generously wanted to send food, clothes and blankets. However, the best tool Haiti could ever acquire for the massive earthquake cleanup would be the funds to keep the rescue efforts coming. And many responded accordingly. U.S. Magazine reported that celebrities helped raise $9 million in one night on Larry King Live. And this does not include donations the average household contributed to the American Red Cross and other charities. Even the young generation broke media relief records by texting contributions through cell phones and chalking up a $10 charge on next month’s bill. 

 “Love never gives up, never loses faith… (I Cor 13:7).”Aid organization Doctors Without Borders had five supply planes diverted from their rescue mission. But it didn’t stop the organization from using quick thinking to do their absolute all in saving lives. Renzo Fricke, the group’s chief in Haiti, told CNN that in order to make life-saving operations: “This morning we had to buy a saw in the market, in the city … for our surgeons to do amputations,” he said, “the medical equipment is not coming as it should arrive.”

Everyone can do something to make a difference in some way.  No matter your age or your financial position or where you live, we call can do something to help in the relief efforts in Haiti.

1. Give, give, give.  The relief effort in Haiti is not going away any time soon.  There are months of work ahead for the Haitian people to rebuild and financial support will need to keep coming.  Find a local charity (or maybe your local church has something going there) to give financially to as often as you or as God leads.  Examples supports Compassion International, a Christian child advocacy ministry that releases children from spiritual, economic, social and physical poverty and enables them to become responsible, fulfilled Christian adults.  http://www.compassion.com  You can make a donation directly to their Haiti relief effort by clicking the below:

https://www.compassion.com/contribution/default.htm

2. Pray, pray, pray.  We should all pray frequently regarding the recovery of Haiti.  Prayer for the families that lost loved ones, for children who lost parents and siblings, for families that lost homes, for individuals that lost everything, for the government to rebuild and strengthen.  There is so much to pray for and God will hear you and answer.

3. Mission Trips.  If the opportunity presents itself, consider taking a missions trip to Haiti to help in the relief efforts and serve the Haitian people with God’s love.  Northwest Haiti Christian Mission is just one organization that is offering opportunities to travel to Haiti to minister to their people.  http://www.nwhcm.org  Your local church may also be planning trips for you and your family to get involved in. 

We all are able to do at least one of the above items in order to help this country.  If you know of other ways for people to get involved with Haiti relief, please let us know by posting a comment or contacting us at contact@examplesyouth.org.  We will review and post for others to read about.

rihanna teaches us to be salty!

Immediately after Rihanna’s interview on ABC’s 20/20 last month, dating abuse hotlines rang off the hook. Calls to the National Domestic Violence crisis line went up 59 percent and teen helplines went up by 73 percent. Her story inspired so many young ladies to reach out from their carefully hidden bruises and plead for help. Although Rhianna reunited with Chris Brown shortly after he attacked her, she eventually walked away from the relationship. And she says her decision was profoundly sparked by the impact she had on her fans.

“When I realized that my selfish decision for love could result into some young girl getting killed, I could not be easy with that part. I couldn’t be responsible,” Rhianna told Diane Sawyer. “If Chris never hit me again, who’s to say their boyfriend won’t?”

Rihanna’s final decision was not only unselfish, but it was a perfect example of how living a responsible life can inspire others to do the same. And for those who believe in Christ, this principle is significant. Sometimes we all can inadvertently become role models, whether it is towards a younger brother or sister who closely watches what we wear and do, or a friend who is curious about our relationship with God but still doesn’t quite understand the gospel.

You can find Rihanna’s daring hairstyles in high schools across the country and hear her voice on car stereos everywhere. So it shouldn’t be a surprise that young and older ladies imitated her decision to get out of an abusive and potentially deadly relationship.  And one can wonder how many look to us? We Christians are supposed to be the salt of the earth. And according to the book of Matthew, if we lose our flavor, who will the world look to as an example?

“..You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden…Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:13-16 NKJV)

We have a responsibility to be a Godly example that inspires others to want and obtain the best life possible.

How many times have we judged others in front of our children, cheated a waitress out of a tip on a lunch date with friends, or grew angry in front of strangers because a line was too long? We must continue to compare our lives to the Word and adjust in the areas that do not reflect love.

“Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors…they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world.” (1 Peter 2:12 NLT)

Rihanna found the strength to rid her own selfishness so that others may benefit. She even possibly saved a life. And if we continue to deny our selfishness, we can possibly lead those closest to us to salvation. With one decision, Rhianna gave hope and encouragement to people everywhere. In our daily walk with Lord, do we?

if He trusted mary…

Luke 2: 1 – 7 (AMP)

¹In those days it occurred that a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that the whole Roman empire should be registered.

²This was the first enrollment, and it was made when Quirinius was governor of Syria.

³And all the people were going to be registered, each to his own city or town.

⁴And Joseph also went up from Galilee from the town of Nazareth to Judea, to the town of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and family of David,

⁵To be enrolled with Mary, his espoused (married) wife, who was about to become a mother.

⁶And while they were there, the time came for her delivery,

⁷And she gave birth to her Son, her Firstborn; and she wrapped Him in swaddling clothes and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room or place for them in the inn.

A few days ago, I heard a story depicting Mary and Joseph’s, as in parents of Jesus, journey to Bethlehem for the census when she was pregnant with Jesus.  It was the first time I ever really considered what Mary went through on that trip or what Joseph may have been feeling.  Think about it – Mary was nine months pregnant and went on what was probably about an 11-day trip on a donkey!  I can’t even imagine going on a road trip in a car for 11 days if I was nine months pregnant!  Just thinking about the discomforts I had when I was in my last trimester…my goodness.  This was not an easy trip for her.

Can you imagine what Joseph was going through?  The woman he loved and was responsible for was exhausted and uncomfortable.  He didn’t have a bed for her to sleep in during the nights.  He didn’t have the comforts from home that could ease her during their travels.  When she went into labor, did he lose it?  Was he frantic and feeling helpless???  I imagine all he could do is his best to find a safe place for her to deliver and do his best to help and provide for her.  That had to have been hard for him.

Now, try to imagine the whole cave scene where Jesus was born.  I already have trouble thinking about natural child birth with no meds!  Mary was surrounded by animals and their excretions, outdoors, and probably laid on the ground while giving birth (maybe she had some hay to lay on I don’t know!).  Bottom line, this was a less than ideal place for her to be, but she got through it and all went well.

When I heard the story, I was like, whoa…I don’t know if I could have done that.  I don’t know if I could have gone through all of those discomforts and hard times.  I’m sure Mary had her doubts at times too, but…God chose her to carry and bare His Son.  He knew Mary would take care of herself while pregnant.  He knew that she would make sound decisions about her body during the delivery.  He also knew that Joseph would have the wisdom, ability, and provisions to take care of her and Jesus.  He trusted them with His only Son.  What a big deal.

After pondering this entire ordeal, I believe the Holy Spirit whispered these words to me, “Hey, I trust you too.”  What???  Wow.  God has put His trust in Eddie and I to care for the two children He has blessed us with.  When things get hard and uncomfortable, He is saying, “I trust you.  I trust you with two of my prized possessions.  Care for them.  Keep and protect them.  Teach and discipline them.  Love them well.”  God has given us all of the wisdom, ability and anointing necessary to raise our children from infants to adulthood.  Just as Mary and Joseph got through that very rough journey, we can get through our very rough journeys in life with our children as we trust and rely on God to lead us.

What peace I have knowing that I don’t have to fear that I am incapable of being a parent.  It’s one of the only jobs you get where there is no orientation prior to getting started.  All of it is on the job training.  So because of this, God has implanted in our Spirits the ability to successfully rear our children as He watchfully and faithfully orders our steps.

So I admonish you today.  If your journey happens to be rough during this season of life, take courage.  God has not left you stranded, just like He did not leave Mary and Joseph stranded with Jesus.  He has equipped you for this occupation and you can do it; and not just get by with the minimum effort, but you can do it well.  The God of Mary and Joseph, the Father of our Lord Jesus, is with you.

“The Princess and the Frog” – big movie release from Disney!

OK, this is really a big deal folks.  I am a big fan of Disney: its products, theme parks, and commitment to family and excellence.  I personally, however, have been very careful about introducing my daughter to the world of the “Disney Princesses.”  I grew up with a host of beauty images that did NOT mirror my large nose, full lips and kinky hair.  I have spent much of my adult life recreating positive images of beauty for myself and am very conscious of those that are before my children.  So, I have been slow to bringing the whole Disney Princess craze into my home which in my opinion indirectly promotes images such as “snow white” skin and long blonde hair (or long black hair or long brown hair…long hair!) as beauty – even though they are beautiful, they are not physical similarities shared by my daughter, who is definitely beautiful as well with her short curly hair, caramel skin, and chubby tummy!

Now, I am very aware that there are many images of beauty in the world; all of different races and ethnicities so don’t get me wrong.  But, what we cannot deny is the HUGE media buzz around the movie The Princess and the Frog and what it means to little African-American girls all over the world.  It is exciting to see and maybe it will be another piece of the puzzle in recreating and adjusting the images of what we all view as beautiful – impacting races of people everywhere.

A press release describes the story as follows (from Art Daily and Disney.com):

When the free-spirited, jazz-loving Prince Naveen of Maldonia (Bruno Campos) comes to town, a deal with a shady voodoo doctor (Keith David) goes bad and the once suave royal is turned into a frog. In a desperate attempt to be human again, a favor in exchange for a fateful kiss on the lips from the beautiful girl, Tiana (Anika Noni Rose), takes an unexpected turn and leads them both on a hilarious adventure through the mystical bayous of Louisiana to the banks of the almighty Mississippi and back in time for Mardi Gras in New Orleans. An unforgettable tale filled with music, humor and heart where two frogs—along with the help of a 197-year-old voodoo priestess, a love-sick Cajun firefly, and a trumpet-playing alligator—discover that what they want isn’t as important as what they need.

In the official trailer it is revealed that once Tiana kisses the frog prince, she herself becomes a frog, and they must journey together to change themselves back to humans.

View movie trailer here: http://disney.go.com/disneypictures/princessandthefrog/

it’s always better to give

“…it is more blessed to give than to receive.” – Acts 20:35

It’s that time of year again…Christmas.  All over the world, little kids are preparing their letters to send to Santa, teenagers are showing their parents commercials about the latest gaming system or cell phone and grown-ups are telling each other what they desire as a present.  One of the most famous questions we usually hear doing this time is, “What are you going to get me for Christmas?”

Sadly to say, a lot of people’s attitudes and actions during this time are motivated solely by what they are planning to receive.  For example, people will buy someone a gift because they want to receive a gift in return.  However, what if we shift our focus this season and purposed solely to see what we can give.  We make giving our motivation for our attitudes and actions, not because we want something in return, but because giving is our desire, not receiving.

As we shift our focus this year, let’s make sure our giving says the following:

1. Our giving should be an expression of our love. John 3:16 says that God love the world so much that His love prompted Him to give. When we give this year, we should follow God’s example and do it because we love the people we are giving the gift to.

2. Our giving should represent our best. John 3:16 also says that God gave his best – His only son – to those He loves.  When we give, we should make sure it represent our best, or something that has value to us.

3. Our giving should be done with a cheerful heart. 2 Corinthians 9:7 says that God loves a cheerful giver.  It also says that we should not give grudgingly.  To give grudgingly means to give something to someone, but in our hearts we really did not want to.  To give with a cheerful heart is to give something to someone, and we are happy and excited to do it.

Ways to Give

Giving your time: A good way to give of your time is to volunteer in some capacity.  I am sure that you have probably seen the people in front of the grocery stores ring the bell for the Salvation Army.  They are actually giving of their time to volunteer to raise money for a great organization.  Or it could be as simple as volunteering to help your mom with Christmas preparation instead of going to the mall with friends.  What personal time can you give up and donate to helping someone else this season.

Giving your talent: To give of your talents is to use the things you are a good at doing to help others.  For example, you may be a great actor and your church is putting on a play at a nursing home.  Volunteering to be a part of the play would be you giving of you talents to bless others.  Do you bake?  Are you good at crafts?  Sometimes original and unique gifts from the heart mean more than buying something flashy from a department store.  Does your grandmother enjoy hot drinks?  Maybe putting together a basket of flavored coffee and tea would mean more to her than a new Blue Ray DVD player.

Giving your resources: This is the most common way of giving during the Christmas season, but it doesn’t always have to mean buying a gift.  There are also many different charities and organizations that could use your financial donation.  For example, Angel Tree is an organization which gives gifts to children who have a parent (or parents) that is incarcerated.  Another organization is Compassion International which gives gifts to children in impoverished countries.  There are many ways you can give of your resources that does not necessarily mean spending a whole lot of money shopping.

There are many ways you can give.  We should all take the time to seek God and consider how He would like for us to spend our time, talents, and resources on in order to be a blessing to others.  Whatever you decide to give this year, let’s make sure that the actual “giving” is your focus and that it is heart-felt, full of love and excitement to do it!

using polls in your youth group with YouVersion

Several months ago, I came across a tool that has really been a tremendous help to my word study time.  This tool is called YouVersion, and from the first day I downloaded it, I became excited about it.

YouVersion is a multi-featured web based application developed by Life Church in Edmond, OK.  The main feature I use from it is its online Bible tool.   If you have an iPhone, BlackBerry, or Android mobile device, there is a downloadable YouVersion application for your convenience.  If you have a different brand of mobile phone, there site is optimized to work in your mobile web browser.   One of the cool things about YouVersion is the convenience of having multiple Bible versions/translations in the palm of your hand – so no matter where you are, as long as you have your mobile device with you, you can read your Bible.

Another cool feature with YouVersion that I’ve recently come across, and what I think will be of a benefit in live events, is their live polling feature.  This feature gives you the ability to poll your audience/youth group/congregation and get instant results.  This would be a great feature to incorporate into your youth Bible study.  My church has used the live polling feature during service and it is eye opening to see the responses and results – almost instantly –  from others in the congregation.

There are plenty of other features that YouVersion offers that could add value to your services.  For more information please visit http://www.youversion.com.

youth leader “RELATE” tip – “praise to parents”

Here’s a quick tip to help build relationships with your teens and their parents.  This month, chose one or two (or a few if you have a bigger youth group) of your teens and write something nice about them.  It can be something that they did that was note worthy, an area of growth that you see them developing in (like reading the Bible more, taking the lead in small groups, praying in front of the group, bringing a friend to Bible study, etc.), or maybe something that they recently achieved in school or somewhere else.

Say something nice and encouraging about them to their parents in a note, put the note in a card or something, and mail it or give it to them personally.  Chose different students to do this for each month and watch the connection between you and their parents start to grow!  The students will feel great too!

For more great Youth Leadership Tips, buy a copy of “Your First Two Years of Youth Ministry” by Doug Fields.

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